5 Ways to break the ice with mum-in-law

Here's an incident that will grab the attention of all prospective daughter-in-laws. UK resident Carolyn Bourne stated in an email to her son's fiancee Heidi Withers that she needed 'guidance from experts' because of her lack of manners. What manners? Apparently, Withers didn't wake up early enough while spending a weekend with her boyfriend's family and didn't write a 'thank you' letter to the would-be mother-in-law! The incident became an internet sensation after the letter went viral. Meeting prospective in-laws is a daunting task for any woman. But you can get it right. Here's how. Don't try to be someone else Your future mother-in-law is bound to be guarded as you are the 'new woman' in her son's life. She wants the best for him, so she'll definitely size you up. Avoid faking an accent or trying to be someone else. Don't show you are nervous Being nervous is natural. However, it helps if you appear confident with a good posture. Don't shy away from making eye contact with your mother-in-law. Skip embarrassing incidents As this is the first time you're meeting, avoid talking about family problems like property fights and narrating embarrassing incidents. Wait and watch Ameeta Shanghavi Shah, a relationship expert, says, "It's best to wait and watch. Be a listener rather than a talker. Don't be confrontational and avoid arguments. Ask questions so you can get to know your mother-inlaw better. Be warm, friendly, courteous and appreciative of the efforts of your hostess. If you think you are not comfortable with the line of questions, change the track of the conversation rather than being rude." Dress right for the occasion Wear something comfortable and not too revealing. A low-cut dress will immediately put an elderly person off, conservative or liberal. Basic etiquette can go a long way in making a good first impression according to clinical psychologist Dr Seema Hingorrany. "Don't be flashy or garish with your choice of clothes or make-up.Take something for your mother-in-law, she is bound to remember the courtesy," she says.