Breakup blues? Yap it out!

Have you had one of those outrageous breakups? Did he leave you high and dry without a clue about what happened to your relationship? As a woman, you are always expected to be soft, composed and undemanding in a relationship. But every now and then, there comes a time when you have to say, 'enough is enough' and give your guy an earful. Never regret such a moment because it actually helps you move forward. Spitting out all that has been pent up is the best way to get rid of breakup blues. Dip in self-esteem "It gets even worse when you don't know why the breakup happened," says relationship counsellor Dr Rajan Bhonsle. Your mind is full of unanswered questions. You feel rejected and you ultimately come down too heavily on yourself thinking, 'I can't maintain a relationship' or worse, 'I'm not wanted'. "Ditching someone without a valid explanation is not right. I would become vengeful," says Alisha Mendonca, a dentist by profession. "If someone's ditching you, it simply indicates he is not worth your efforts. So, I would let him go. But I would want him to realize a woman's worth before he starts behaving similarly in his future relationships," adds Alisha. Be a new YOU Breakups aren't supposed to make you feel inferior. Even while your emotions are playing tricks on you, you have to know that you are just as good as you were before meeting your ex. The problem with women is that they tend to be self-critical and analytical about being dumped. But the best answer would be to go wild! It helps you feel better. "If my guy ditches me, I would certainly move on but only after I teach him a lesson," says Sneha Ash, a post-graduate student. "I would probably assure him that I love him the most and convince him to be with me. Once he's back, I would dump him to let him know how it feels when you're ditched without being given a chance to make things better," she adds. No comparisons, please Comparing yourself to the girl you think your ex might be eyeing is a recipe for disaster. "Get rid of everything that reminds you of him. If you're left with gifts you just can't part with, box them up and store them out of sight. The most important key to recovery is to give free rein to your emotions," says Dr Bhonsle. The idea is to show that you have more strength than anyone gave you credit for.